Archive for June, 2011

“No, I’m not OK”

Posted in darkness, despair, Poetry, vice with tags , , , , , on June 11, 2011 by drevolutionary1

Vodka to wash away the sorrows
Good dick to cure the loneliness
Greasy vittles provide a high
Eyes bloodshot and full of pain

48 waking hours with no rest
The vices are strong
And sooth the wretch
But only for a moment

Thought about writing that note
But not tonight, naw not tonight
Hopefully not ever
Please slap me if I do…

But I can’t look in the mirror
I’m afraid of what I’ll see
That denial feeds my addictions
And prevents alacrity

Trapped I am
And trapped I will be
Like the mouse in the maze
Am I smart enough to break free?

Shit… Shit!
My life’s always been so…
Contained
And decent… planned…

It’s tempting to fuck it up
To sabotage a good thing
Watch the wreckage
Like something you saw on I-95

I want to submit to the darkness
For a change…
No rage against the dying of the light
On the contrary

A sense of decency reels me in
Now and again
But somehow I always wind up
Back here in this place

This place I don’t want to be
But am
And I try to deal
And smile and say, “I’m OK”

But inside
I’m really NOT fucking OK
I’ve swallowed gasoline
And someone’s threw a match my way

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A man of stature

Posted in TBC on June 8, 2011 by drevolutionary1

A man of stature
With broad shoulders
Full-figured in all the right places
He towers over me

Beautiful luscious lips
And soft hazel eyes
A beard wooly and thick
Just like his thighs

A warm smile
That meets mine in embrace
As our tongues war
In a sea of brown

He melts himself down
And pours himself into me
As I vulcanize
A durable ebonite forms

What keeps me?
It’s waking in the morning
Knowing my gentle giant is still there
To shield my soul

My gentle giant can protect me
And sing away my fears
Dry my tears
Make me forget the pain

He knows my need and desires
Before I can verbalize them
Our hearts
Linked by echolocation

One day he’ll come
And I’ll be ready
But for now all I can do
Is dream of a man of stature